Four Months into 2019: His Grace Is Still Sufficient (For Grace to Fully Comprehend This)!

This morning, my internal clock would not permit slumber past 6:15, despite staying up about an hour late to read a book, The Sacred Search by Gary Thomas (so far, I would recommend it!). Oh well, it's actually a blessing to be able to wake up early on a Saturday without being horribly exhausted and have quiet time to oneself. 

Three words come to mind upon reflection of the the past month of life: Revealing, Stretching, and Rebuking (to my OCD self in the future: not alphabetized because the order wouldn't be correct) .

Revealing: Through life circumstances, God has been revealing Himself to me so much by reminding me 1) of my wretched, sinful state; 2) His incredible Gospel of salvation; and 3) my failure to surrender all, including the guilt of my sin, to Him. 

Stretching: This past month, I participated in a group event with the person I'm dating, and learned a lot about "getting over" the discomfort of not being an official part of a close-knit group, putting off my selfishness. and learning to be content and joyful in all circumstances. Not saying I perfected this by any means; in fact, the entire day was an internal battle within myself. 

Further stretching has been in that area to which I alluded at the beginning of the above paragraph: being in a relationship. Never having been in a relationship, I have no prior experiences or emotions to check against the events and feelings I'm going through now. The past couple of months have been confusing, to say the least, and I'm struggling to know the will of the Lord, and what it looks like to know what brings Him the most glory.

Jim Elliot once said something along the lines of, "He is no fool of gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." I have been praying and thinking hard about whether or not I have truly been giving my entire life and heart to my Savior before anything else, including in my relationship. God's Word promises that those who trust in the Lord with their entire heart will be led by God (see, e.g. Proverbs 3:5-6), but He doesn't say that there isn't a waiting period in which our trust in Him is perfected through the unknown! In fact, He promises that those who "wait on the LORD" will renew their strength! See, e.g. Isaiah 40:28-31.

Rebuking: Finally, this month has been rebuking. As mentioned above, I've been challenged to examine my relationship to God, realizing that I am not fully surrendering myself (and my sinfulness) to Him; failed to see and know His glory; been self-focused; and  failed to love God above all else. In short, this passage rings true: "Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin."

Romans 7:24-25 (English Standard).

In closing (since it is nearly 8 a.m. and the morning is growing late), this passage we read during the high school group this week struck a cord and applies to what God has been revealing to me:

Remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, ²to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people. ³For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. ⁴But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, ⁵he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, ⁶whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, ⁷so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

Titus 3:1-7 (English Standard).

Nana reading to the Chunk (3) and Baby Em

Thankful for the opportunity to see this dear friend for a brief afternoon visit last week!

"Baca" (great-grandma) with Baby Em. A precious, precious moment.

Baby Lucy 

Enjoying a break-taking view of the beach a few weeks back -- this is the day spent with the new group of individuals. The beach was truly amazing, and God's glory was so evident in everything.

Baby Em continues to capture our hearts!

A trip to a different beach a week before the above beach picture! We had a lovely time visiting two light houses and walking several different trails.

We also visited an old military fort and had a little too much fun climbing the cannons and exploring the various buildings and trails.

Mozzarella and I are so blessed to be able to work together, she as the lovely face of the firm (receptionist) and me as a legal assistant.

The Chunk doing pre-running "stretches" with me.

A gorgeous flower, give from the bottom of his "heart and kidneys" (it's a phrase in Russian, and "kidneys" is now my favorite word to pronounce in Russian -- it's pronounced kind of like "pohych-kee") 

Hold fast to Jesus!

Sonia